Boop the Snoot for Critical Damage!
by The Mad Dragon
Summary: Fusing the high-octane universe of RWBY with the high-octane universe of Borderlands, the Boopverse aims to become the highest of octanes! Join an all-new and gently warped version of Team RWBY as they seek the Vault of Pandora, with all of it's treasures... and all of it's horrors.
1. Chapter 1

_Once upon a time, humanity made the mistake of trying to conquer the stars._

_Well, it was slightly more complicated than that, but the general gist of what I'm getting at is that even with, y'know, ALL OF SPACE, humanity still felt the need to go to war with itself for territory._

_After a few centuries of on and off slaughter, the human race has split off not into nations as one might hope, but a menagerie of self interested corporations all vying for power. And by power, I mean Eridium._

_The magic substance that makes faster than light speeds possible, and, well... has a tendency to lure the creature's of Grimm like fly's to honey._

_And where there's Grimm... there's gonna be Bandits._

_Poor lost souls who didn't have the good fortune to be killed by the monsters. Instead, they're taken to the Grimm's lair and... made to put on a mask that strips them of all their sanity. It warps them into something... no longer human. Best thing you can do for them is to put them down._

_Anyway it's not entirely hopeless. Humanity soon learned that wherever there's Eridium, there's Dust. And where there's Dust, there's hope._

_Hope... that comes in the form of the Huntsmen and Huntresses of the Interstellar Hunting Agency. An independent organization dedicated to protecting the human race from Bandits, Grimm, and in some sad cases, each other. The major corporations... kinda get along with the IHA to varying degrees depending on where you live. But one thing they all agree on? Anyone willing to go fight the forces of darkness are to be greeted with open arms. (Even if they try to skimp out on paying bounties. Bastards.)_

_So, that's the current state of things. Bad corporations, evil monsters, and those who are stupid or brave enough to keep the wheel turnin' for humanity._

_And in the middle of all this, in far off corner of the universe, a deadly little planet named Pandora sings her siren call of an ancient alien Vault and the endless glory, riches- and maybe even a little hope- contained within..._

_But only fools believe that._

* * *

**_RED_**

* * *

With the grace and dignity of a rocket propelled brick, a small transport crashed into one of Pandora's many Hell deserts, creating a several mile long trench. Most of the ancient looking machine's fins and wings were scraped off as it screeched across the desert. Before it came to a halt, its weight flattened a four legged creature with a vertical mouth as it was innocently chewing on the skull of a hapless traveler.

As what was left of the ship's hull began to cool, a panel popped off, and a feminine figure clad in a bright red cloak emerged from the wreckage.

"So that's why they rented it to me for so cheap." She sighed as the one remaining wing fell to the ground. She reached back into the hole she exited from, and pulled a heavy red duffel bag to her shoulder. "Welp! No use crying over spilled milk, or the fifty dollars I spent on this! Time to kick-start this treasure hunt!" She cheerfully declared.

The young woman lowered her hood an shrugged her cloak to her back revealing a fetching young woman black and red hair, wearing a short red skirt, combat boots, and a sleeveless black tank top.

And on the left side of her body where the pale skin was exposed, blue tattoos glistened with sweat from the top her shoulder to all the way down to wear leg met boot.

_**RUBY ROSE as...**_

_**THE CRIMSON SIREN **_

Just as Ruby was about to pick a random direction to walk in, her scroll began to ring. She frowned as she opened it and saw it was from a number she didn't know. "Telemarketers? Even on Pandora? Sheesh." She said as she hit the 'ignore' button.

The scroll rang a second time. Same number. She pouted and hit ignore again.

She made it another few steps before something in her pocket began to beep. Confused, she pulled out a long rectangular device and unfolded it into some kind of tablet configuration. Upon it's screen were the words: _'PLEASE, ANSWER YOUR SCROLL! IT'S A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH!'_

Ruby gasped. "I didn't even get past my lock screen! Yang was right! Hackerman is real!"

She shoved the device back into her pocket, and picked up her pace, trying to leave the hacker-haunted ship behind.

The scroll rang a third time, she didn't even bother checking it before she hit ignore.

Then another loud beeping sounded off, this time from her duffel bag. Horrified, she turned her eyes to the sound.

"No, no, no, no, no! Not my laptop! That's where my games live!"

Reluctantly she pulled the computer out, and read what was on the screen.

_'I'M NOT KIDDING! I'M TRYING TO HELP YOU! NOW, PLEASE. ANSWER. YOUR. SCROLL!'_

The scroll once more rang. Ruby reluctantly answered it. "Hackerman?"

The panicked voice of a young woman answered. _"I- what? No! My name's Angel, and you're in terrible danger!"_

Ruby looked around her. There was naught but the wreckage of her rental and the empty desert. "Um, I don't know how to break this to you, but I already crashed."

_"I'm not talking about that! You have a Bandit war band closing in on your position! You have maybe three minutes!'_

"Oh?" Ruby answered cheerfully. "That's great!"

_"If you follow my instructions, I can guide you to a- wait. Did you just say 'great?'"_

"Yep!" Ruby replied, setting her bag down and rummaging through its contents. "I don't suppose you could tell me what kind?"

_"I- okay... satellite feeds show twenty-one Beowolves, three Ursas, fourteen Psychoes, seven Maruaders, and three Bruisers._" There was a small pause as the caller let the words sink in. _"Er, would you like to run away? I can get you to an escape route-"_

"Pft, nah." Ruby said as she pulled out a blocky red contraption. With a gesture, it folded out into a heavy sniper rifle. "My Dad used to make me kill more than that back at home for training."

_"Oh... cool. That must have been... nice?"_ Angel said awkwardly. _"So, I presume you're here for the Vault?"_

"Yep!" The young Siren replied, detaching the barrel of the sniper rifle, placed it into the bag, and retrieved a double-barreled replacement with the Vladof logo printed on its base. She popped it into place and replaced the weapon's clip with a drum. "How'd you guess?"

_"Well, it's the only thing that's interesting about Pandora that really draws anyone in... and it's a known fact that all Sirens are drawn to the Vault in their dreams."_

Ruby paused. "... Oh. I suppose you saw me with those satellite's you mentioned, huh?"

_"They're pretty high resolution, yeah. Saw the tattoo's from miles away. Literally!"_ She answered with a somewhat forced cheerful tone.

"... I wouldn't say the dream thing is a 'known' fact. I had to do a bunch of reading on it." Ruby added, clearly uncomfortable. She pulled a small headset from her pocket, put it on her ear, and quietly connected it to her scroll so the conversation could continue while keeping her hands free.

_"I-um, have a lot of time on my hand to research this. Speaking of time, you're almost out of it. Bad guys coming into view on your six."_

The Siren turned to the trench her ship had left. In the distance she could now see dark figures on the horizon. "Well, it looks like I get to give Crescent Rose's new mods a work out."

_"Crescent Ro-? Oh, right. Hunters like to name their weapons."_

Ruby easily hefted the heavy weapon and peered through the scope. Sure enough, there was a small hoard of Grimm steadily charging toward her position, clearly following the wreckage of her ship. There were the expected monsters, completely black bodies bearing white masks, and baleful yellow eyes. But it was their riders that drew one's eyes.

Atop each Grimm were men and women hooting and hollering, the masks seared into the flesh of their faces bore a striking similarity to the beasts they rode. Their limbs longer, and in some unfortunate cases, _twisted._ A black miasma surrounded their corrupted bodies, a remnant of their dead Aura. As Angel had said, there were indeed fourteen of the thin limbed Psycho's wielding their traditional buzz-saw axes riding Beowolves, seven helmeted gun toting Marauders riding alongside them, and towards the back were three huge Bruisers clinging to even bigger Ursa's.

Ruby suppressed a wince. She always felt a _little_ bad about having to kill Bandits. It wasn't their fault the Grimm decided they were good enough to fuse hellish white masks to their faces and make them into servants of evil.

She sighed and remembered what her father told her as they proceeded at rapid pace to her position._ Bandits aren't people, we save what's left of them by killing them. Bandits aren't people, we save what's left of them by killing them. Bandits aren't people, we save what's left of them by killing them._

_"FOR BLOOD, LOOT, AND PONIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIES!"_ The lead Psycho yelled as they charged...

_...directly_ into Crescent Rose's line of fire.

The twin barrels of the Vladof mod spun with each shot the heavy rifle shot. Four of the Beowolves were the first to fall, one even crushing its Psycho rider to death under its weight. Two of the Marauders followed in their demise as Ruby relieved them of the top half of their skulls. Ruby re-prioritized back to the Beowolves and took out an additional three with sustained fire. Eventually, the weapon clicked empty as it's drum ran dry.

The small hoard, undeterred by their losses, continued rushing forward. Ruby smiled. Pefect.

The Beowolf riding Psychoes in all their predictable bloodthirst, were the first to close the distance between them and their prey.

Three riders and their mounts died as Crescent Rose transformed into a gigantic scythe and cut them down like so much wheat in two slashes. Their bodies did not spray blood as one might expect from a baseline human, but a black oily substance that stank of rot and death.

The following wave dismounted and ran to the side in hopes of flanking the young Huntress. When they descended upon her, they fully expected her to fall to their spinning buzz-axes, only to have her vanish in a shower of Rose petals. One of the Bandits was about to demand find her- (Or to comment on the baby skin teddy bear she had recently made- It's hard to tell with Bandits) only to have Ruby appear instantly reappear behind her. The Siren took the opportunity to separate the Psycho from her head.

The Bandits were caught off guard and practically tripped over themselves to be the first to kill their foe.

Ruby waded into the fray, jumping, skipping, and dancing as the scythe chopping through heads and limbs like that one Tediore blender your mother got you, but were too nervous to tell her that you had a superior Atlas model.

When the last Psycho fell, the Beowolves struck, moving much faster and striking much harder than their riders had, Ruby was forced not to just dodge but to block several attacks that jolted her from her arms all the way to her spine. She grunted as she flipped high into the air, used a Marauder's helmet as a springboard, and launched herself above two of the Beowolves and neatly scythed their heads off.

Feeling somewhat overconfident in herself, she almost didn't notice the Psycho running at her until she heard the whirring sound of her buzz axe coming at her head.

"I WANT TO BURN YOUR BABIES!" Screamed the Psycho as she brought her spinning axe down on the young Huntress.

Ruby deftly blocked it with Crescent Rose. "I don't have babies!"

The Psycho seemed taken aback. "Oh, sorry! Terribly presumptive of me! I WANT TO BURN YOUR UNUSED UTERUS!"

Ruby responded by caving in her mask-fused skull with an Aura-enhanced punch.

_"Unusually polite for a Bandit."_ Angel remarked.

"Oh!" Ruby exclaimed as she cut a charging Beowolf vertically in half. "You're still on the line?"

_"Um, yeah... I didn't know if I should have ended the call there, or..."_

"Conversation with strangers is weird and hard." Ruby said with complete understanding.

Angel sighed in relief. _"Exactly... er, I'm not sure if you're already aware of this, or if I'm crossing a line by pointing this out..."_

"I welcome useful feedback!" Ruby assured cheerfully as she kicked the legs out from under a Beowolf and speared the pointy pommel of Crescent Rose through the back of it's unarmored neck and out through it's eye.

_"The Ursa's and the Bruisers. They've been circling you the whole fight. I don't know what they're waiting for."_

Ruby frowned and cast her gaze to the edge of the skirmish as she continued to massacre Beowolves and Psychoes. The big Grimm were indeed circling the perimeter of the battle, most likely waiting for her to tire herself out on the small fry. The Siren growled adorably. She _hated_ dealing with the smart ones. It meant she wouldn't get to _play around_ anymore.

Finishing a twirling dance of weedwhacker-esque death, Ruby suddenly noticed that there were no more of the buzz-saw wielding bandits their Beowolf mounts left.

Of course, the Marauders took the opportunity to open fire on the Huntress now that there were no more of their allies in the way.

Ruby squeaked as she was forced to use her speed to evade the gunfire.

_"Er, I'd recommend getting more ammo, if you have any."_ Angel tentatively suggested.

"Yeah," Ruby replied. "Probably should!"

Launching out of the Marauder's line of fire in a stream of rose petals, Ruby made a beeline to where she had set her duffel bag down. She quickly yanked out a large clip with a 'Maliwan' logo printed on it with a small cartoon flame beside it. She ejected the Vladof drum and slammed the new one in just in time for the Maruader's to home in on her position and resume their assault. Ruby made an Aura-boosted hop out of the way, but it was not without it's cost...

The duffel bag slipped out of her hands and was shot out of the air by sheer chance. She watched as a case containing several hundred chocolate chip cookies tumbled out of her duffel bag, spilling out and crumbling in the Bandit-blood soaked dust.

"You absolute _monsters!"_ She cried. "Those were supposed to last me for three days! I was going to _ration_ them!"

Letting loose a high pitched war cry, she converted Crescent Rose into its sniper rifle configuration and launched into the air. She fired on the Marauders twice, and two died as the flaming .50 caliber rounds collided into them. This led to the delightfully horrific effect of setting the Beowolves they were riding upon _also_ on fire.

Ruby landed in a roll and snapped a triple burst into a third Maruader and his mount. As they thrashed about in their death throws, Ruby saw an opportunity. She smirked. She'd always wanted to try this.

"FOR THE COOKIES!" Ruby yelled, transforming the weapon into scythe mode and running directly at the Beowolves. Lining up her attack _just right,_ she fell into a slide and decapitated not one, but two of the Grimm with a single stroke.

_"... Ow."_

"Oops! Sorry!" Ruby apologized sincerely as she used the resulting chaos to slaughter the Marauders and their mounts with terrifyingly effective slashes and cuts. "Kinda didn't think about _shouting_ while I had my headset on!"

_"It's alright. Do you have enough Aura left to deal with the big ones? Because I still have that escape route plotted. See, there's this old DAHL mining tunnel that leads to-"_

"It's _fiiiiine!_ While I am running a bit low, I have other gifts I can count on!" She smiled as the Bruiser and their Ursa finally decided to join the fight.

"GONNA MEET YOUR MAKER!" The center Bandit cried.

Ruby didn't respond, she merely focused on every single wisp of rose petal shaped Aura she had left behind on the battlefield. And as the blue tattoos on her body began to glow, every single one of the petals responded and flowed in a humongous stream to her outstretched hand. With a gesture, she sent the storm of spent Aura directly into the path of her large foes. Once they were fully engulfed, she squeezed her fist...

And the rose petals _exploded._

The Ursas howled in outrage as they were badly burnt from the assault, and one of the Bruiser/Ursa pair was even outright killed.

_"Oh... Cool. I guess I'll just... set you up with a Catch-a-Ride subscription while you finish."_

"Sure thing! Thanks!" Ruby replied as she took the opportunity to rush forward and slash the hind legs off a wounded Ursa. As both it and it's Bruiser tumbled to the ground, she proceeded to take the beast's head off with an efficient downward slice.

It's rider attempted to exact vengeance for his steed and fired a heavy shotgun at her, only to scream in frustration as she cartwheeled out of the way. While he reloaded, the other remaining Bruiser attempted to get a bead on her with the heavy machine gun he carried. Ruby put a stop to _that_ by lining up Crescent Rose and putting an incendiary round directly into his forehead. That left only one Bruiser and one Ursa...

Speaking of which, Ruby readied Crescent Rose and turned to face the sound of heavy running footsteps closing in on her. Badly burnt, the last Bandit howled as he charged. To her surprise, the Bruiser's shotgun _shifted_ and transformed into an chainsaw. Ruby winced hard. He must have been a Huntsman once...

She deftly sidestepped the Bandit... and groaned in sympathy as he tripped and fell into the sole surviving Ursa as it was gettng back into its feet. The chainsaw plunged into the monsters neck.

"MAMA BEAR! _NOOOOOOOOOOOO!"_ He cried as pulled out the chainsaw and whirled back in on Ruby.

The Bruiser howled sorrow and charged once more. He brought his empty axe in with a heavy swing, meaning to cave his foe's head in. Instead, Crescent Rose came down, collided with his shoulder and just _pushed right through his torso and out his hip._ She sighed in both relief and disappointment, for the oversized Bandits had been the last.

Ruby sidestepped the two halves of the now dead Bruiser, and continued her conversation on her scroll.

"Wait. Angel? What's a 'Catch-a-Ride?'"

Angel sighed. _"I'll explain as you go, but your final destination will be to 'Grandma's House: The Bed and Breakfast.' I'll meet you there. I think I have a job offer for you, if you still want to look for the Vault."_

Ruby shrugged as she picked up her damaged duffel bag. "To Grandma's House I go, then."

* * *

_AN: This idea has been banging around in my head for a while now. __Oh, have some profile-y bits:_

_NAME: Ruby Rose_

_CLASS: Siren_

_WEAPON: Crescent Rose (Sniper Rifle/Scythe)_

_AGE: 18_

_HEIGHT: Laughable_

_WEIGHT: Throw-able_

_SEMBLANCE: Class 5 speed, leaves behinds wisps of spent aura resembling rose petals_

_SIREN POWERS: Able to utilize 'rose petal' Aura remnants as ablative shields, explosives, or harden them into lethal blades_

_WANTED: ALIVE_

_CRIME: Siren_

_BOUNTY: $750,000,000,000.03_

_Next chapter: Surprise! Your family's company just got taken over by your enemies, you assets are frozen, and your stuck on a one way trip to a Hell planet! Happy Birthday, Weiss!_


	2. Chapter 2

_**WHITE**_

* * *

Cradling her head in her hands, a young woman in a white and red combat dress groaned into her hands as the automated cargo hauler carried her through the stars. Her shoulder was encased in mechanical white plating, with glowing blue lines pulsing gently. And on her other side was an ornate rapier with a thick base resembling a revolver.

As she brooded, her scroll began to ring. Raising her face from her hands, a hopeful look flitted across porcelain features marred only a thin scar over her eye. Maybe someone had made it out?

_**WEISS SCHNEE as**_

_**THE PENNILESS HEIRESS**_

Accepting the call, she quickly demanded information. "Klein? Mother? Whitley? Did anyone else escape the atta-"

Unfortunately, the caller that interrupted her was neither friend, nor family._ "Heya, kiddo! Your pal, Handsome Jack, here! Don't bother answering back, I got you on mute!"_

Weiss could only hold the phone to her ear in abject shock.

_"Now, you might be wondering why I just launched an all out assault on the SDC's homeworld, killed millions of your fellow citizens, and basically stole every single thing your family's built for the last two generations. Well, slugger, it all started when your dear old man _lied _to me."_

_"Hrrm! Urgk!"_ Gurgled the voice of another man on the line before sounds of flesh beating flesh silenced him.

_"You dad says 'hi.' Or at least I think that was a 'hi.' Hard to tell since I, y'know, cut out his lying tongue. Old fashioned, I know. But I already _have _a piece_ _severed facial on display hair from my defeated enemies."_

Weiss opened and closed her mouth, unable to even comprehend how to respond to that.

_"And maybe, just maybe, if your old man hadn't tried to screw me over by raising the Dust prices forty percent higher than what we agreed upon, none of this would have happened. Ah, no use crying over spilt milk. This works out better. The SDC Board of Directors even agree with me! Well, the ones I let live, anyway."_

The young heiress dropped her face into her free hand.

_"Oh! And I just wanted to let you know that you don't have to worry about your bank balance anymore, because I had the SDC bank transfer all funds to my personal fund to build a diamond horse stable. Still haven't found your mother or your brother in this big ass place, though! But hey, I figure all I have to do to find your mom is look at the bottom of the nearest bottle. As for little Whitley... I figure once we have him I'll just toss him into the poorest orphanage I can find. Y'know, just for giggles."_

Weiss frowned at the confusing feelings that stirred in her. Concern? Resentment? Anger? Sadness? ... Relief?

She came to the conclusion that she'd just shove those feelings deep down inside her and not reflect on them.

_"Now, I know you got your heart set on going to Atlas, probably banking on the history of good will your two companies had with each other before your daddy got greedy and ruined everything, and maybe fling yourself at your sisters feet and leech off her success. But that's not gonna happen. 'Cause while I've been serenading you with the soothing tone of my voice, a Hyperion assault freighter has been closing in on your ship."_

The ship jolted as something much larger clamped on to it. Weiss jumped to her feet, weapon at the ready. The scroll strained as she gripped it tighter, and continued to listen to the monologue.

_"Here's the thing, Muffin. Your Daddy, in addition to trying to rip me off, apparently made a little drone with a whole bunch of neat features... that he had some hackers steal from Hyperion data banks. And during the whole liberation of the SDC- we're still calling it a liberation, right?" _A small voice in the background of the call answered in the affirmative. _"Right. When we 'liberated' your planet, we came across some footage of you here in this house. We saw you grab it. We know you have it, Sweetness."_

Weiss's eyes darted to the mechanical pauldron on her shoulder.

_"I'm gonna give you a choice, Pumpkin. Hand over the drone and die a quick clean death, or we take the drone and you die messy. Personally, I don't think you have a last stand in you, seeing as how you ran away as soon as your planet's capital city fell from all the orbital bombarding I smacked it with. Looks like all the 'heroism' your Grandpa had must have all went to big sis, huh?"_

Weiss's hands clenched into fists.

_"Now, I know this is a big decision. But if it makes it easier, just know you're helping the real hero build a better futu- oh, what now?"_

Another voice, urgent and fearful, interrupted Jack.

_"... The hell do you mean 'the 4N631 satellite is missing?' And please bear in mind that I routinely kill for far, far less."_

More fearful murmuring, followed by a vicious snarl from Jack and the sound of a hand canon firing.

_"Okay!"_ Jack inhaled sharply. _"I gotta take this. Be seeing your corpse soon, Princess. Say 'hi' to the Loader bots for me. See ya!"_

The line cut- not that it did anything to make Weiss feel better. For she could now see large chunks on the hull that were now being cut by high powered lasers.

Her mind began to race. It was very likely that the cargo vessel was already disabled, so there was no escape staying here... so that left using the attackers ship. She sighed as she popped open her sword and began to load several different types of elemental rounds. This was going to be..._annoying._

The first of the blocky yellow and white machines descended as the hull gave way. Landing in a crouch, it never stood a chance as Weiss created a green glyph that gushed a stream of foul smelling liquid upon it. The GUN Loader gave a monotone cry as the corrosive acid ate through its armor. As it jerked about, trying to dislodge as much of the gunk as it could, Weiss darted forward and stabbed past its single eye, and deep into its central processor.

As the machine died, Weiss withdrew her blade and hopped backward as three additional GUN Loaders fell from the ceiling.

The Heiress danced backward, triggered her weapon, and a shower of large icicles erupted from the glyph that appeared at the tip of the blade.

The Loaders were rendered nonfunctional as the icy spears impaled their vital mechanisms. "OW." They stated their custom emotionless tone as they perished.

Weiss took this opportunity to use an Aura assisted jump _through_ the hole the machines had breached from. She huffed as she landed over the still hot rim the hole. Two additional GUN Loaders were apparently waiting to drop in as they spotted her. The first actually had time to fire a few rounds into her Aura as she repeated the same maneuver as before, and speared the machine through the eye and into its brain.

Weiss spun out the way as the other robot tried to smoosh her against the bulkhead. She proceeded to counter its attack with a precise cut, and severed the arm with the gun attached. The Loader attempted to retaliate, but she was already on the move and twirled behind it as it came in swinging with its remaining arm.

The green glyph once again appeared as she showered the corporate enforcer drone with acid at _point blank._

With no enemies in sight, Weiss took a moment to breathe and berate herself. She had let a _basic Loader_ hit her. Her sister must never find out about this, otherwise she would _disown her._

She sighed as she scanned her surroundings. She was in a large cargo bay with six unoccupied recharge docks for Loaders... and eight that were _not_ empty.

Weiss snapped into a combat stance as three EXP Loaders, three HOT Loaders, and two BUL Loaders stirred to life. She hummed to herself in consideration. Now was as good a time to test the drone as any. Lifting the arm with the pauldron attached, she shouted out one of the few command phrases she knew.

_"Kalterwind, attacke!"_

The pauldron unfolded into a four winged insectoid robot the size a cat, and proceeded to launch itself at the 'face' of the nearest BUL Loader. The robot screamed in simulated agony as Kalterwind's laser stinger sliced the plates apart. After a moment, the machine fell dead to the floor, and the drone scanned for its next target. It selected the other BUL Loader... which decided now was a good time to transform into 'bulldozer' mode and put some distance between them. Kalterwind _pursued._

Meanwhile, Weiss did not stand idle.

Summoning the green glyph again, she prioritized taking out the EXP Loaders while moving steadily backward out the the HOT Loaders range. The black and yellow striped Loaders attempted to jog into towards Weiss as their overloaded power cores popped out of their heads and began to hum ominously. Weiss proceeded to make it rain corrosive acid upon all three. She smiled in satisfaction as they detonated quite safely away from her. Unfortunately the HOT Loaders took this opportunity to charge.

She was about to repeat what she had to done to the previous three robots, when the hidden trigger in her blade clicked empty. The corrosive round had been _spent._ Backing up into a bulkhead, Weiss's eyes widened as she saw their barrels light up with flame.

_"Kalterwind! Schild!"_ She shouted with far less dignity then she would have preferred.

The drone, in the middle of ruthlessly murdering the remaining BUL Loader, launched itself at rapid speed to its owner. Closing the distance between them, it halted directly over her head and began to emit a shimmering blue dome over the both of them. The HOT Loaders flames collided against the shield with no effect.

Weiss took this time to eject the spent round and insert a fresh one. She _tsked_ in annoyance as she found she only had one left. "Should probably conserve this." She whispered to herself.

Kalterwind began to emit a shrill beeping sound to signify that the shield was nearing the end of its sustainable 'up time.' Fortunately, the HOT Loaders flamethrowers stopped so they could go into their automatic cooldown. _Unfortunately_, that left them their strong, human-squishing Loader arms within crushing radius.

Weiss quickly formulated a plan. Forming a black glyph beneath her feet, she flung herself high into the air over their swinging arms as the shield collapsed. Kalterwind followed suit, and went back to her shoulder in pauldron mode.

Mixing it up a little, she brought forth a blue glyph and froze their legs to the ground. As they attempted to wiggle free, Weiss breathed in deep. This would require _precision._

She poked the air three times with her weapon, leaving a red glyph hovering over each point. She narrowed her eyes and flicked her sword. Three fireballs soared out like little comets... _directly_ into the fuel tanks of the HOT Loaders flamethrowers.

Detonating with the dignity of a exploding toilet, the last of the Loaders died.

Sheathing her blade, Weiss sighed in relief. Even for a ship as small as this one was, this was a pleasantly undermanned vessel. Handsome Jack must not have thought much at all of her combat capability, otherwise he would have included something with heavier ordnance than these Loaders had been equipped with!

And right on cue, red lights began to flash over a large door as alarms sounded to alert all who might be in the Loader bay. Weiss cursed her luck as she unsheathed her weapon and watched the huge doors slide apart.

And not a moment too soon, for before her, waiting its storage dock, lay an oversized and overarmed KLL Loader.

It took a Weiss a moment to gather herself as she watched the machine unfold itself into a standing position. She barely came up to the damned thing's knees.

"This is _ridiculously_ unfair." She growled to herself as she ejected the fire Dust and loaded new rounds labeled TORGUE into the blade. "Told myself I'd never stoop low enough to use these-"

Her complaint was interrupted as the KLL Loader opened fire with it's six gun-arms.

"Kalterwind! FLIEGEN!" She cried as she ran desperately out of the line of fire.

The drone transformed and rotated itself onto its mistress's back. Resembling a small backpack, four wings of light erupted from it and sent Weiss into the air.

Now _flying,_ the huntress desperately fired the new rounds. Orange glyphs, resembling a cartoon explosion effect, rained somewhat slower fireballs upon the KLL Loaders right arm joint. Exploding with the force of grenades, they successfully dismembered the arm and caused the three guns to fall to the ground. Almost as if it was angry, the Loader responded by charging the 'head' atop its shoulder with power.

_"SCHILD!"_ Weiss shouted as she summoned a thick ice wall between herself and the Loader.

Landing as the drone detached from her back and converted to shield mode, Weiss began to form a _new_ plan. The ice wall started to crumble as the KLL Loader fired a powerful arc of lighting from its eye.

Taking what little time she had, Weiss focused her Aura into the palm of her hand and formed a tiny white glyph. As it spun, a tiny white knight appeared in her hand. Smirking, Weiss grasped the little fellow and looked to the crumbling wall. _"Fliegen!"_ She ordered.

Once again converting into flightpack mode, Kalterwind sent Weiss high into the air.

Soaring over the KLL Loader, she proceeded to stagger the giant death machine with more TORGUE rounds. The KLL Loader stumbled about as Weiss landed directly unto it's shoulder and shoved the tiny Knight right into the gaping hole where its arm had been. She kicked off back into the air as the Loader could swat her into paste.

Flying clear of its reach, Weiss's expression was decisively _smug._

The KLL Loader's frame suddenly rang with the sound of a tiny knight wreaking as much havoc as it could within the inner mechanisms. The great machine fell to its knees as it jerked to and fro.

Not wasting the chance, Weiss shouted;_ "Kalterwind! ATTACKE!"_

The drone once again detached from her and flew directly into the KLL Loader's face and... did _gruesomely_ unholy things to it.

Weiss landed before the robot, ran into a somersault, kicked off the remaining gun arm, and landed on the Loaders back. (As well as valiantly ignoring the tearing of metal and circuitry her drone was causing. Robot on robot violence _should not_ look like something out of a slasher movie.) She held a hand over what she _hoped_ was the right spot, and willed the knight to create an opening. Sure enough, the little guy obliged and punctured a small hole with his sword. The Huntress quickly dismissed him back within her soulspace.

Using her Aura to enhance her strength as much as it could, Weiss drove her blade deep within the small opening and severed the cords connecting the KLL Loaders power core. The machine slumped to the ground in defeat.

Weiss sighed explosively. This had gone on _long enough._ She hopped off the Loader and walked to a doorway that had been to the side of the KLL Loader's dock and marched through it as it swung open automatically. Kalterwind, sensing the _fun_ was over, returned to her shoulder.

Going forwards a ways, she followed the instructions painted on the wall to the front of the ship. Soon enough she found her destination as the doors gave way.

Two pilots in Hyperion uniforms awaited in the cockpit. "STOP IN THE NAME OF JACK!" One shouted in panic.

Weiss responded by deploying icy spears into their bodies. She calmly walked past their dying bodies and to the controls. Surely Hyperion didn't make anything _too_ complicated for its lackluster employees to opera-

Her slowly improving mood came crashing down as the monitors above the controls declared:

**_CONTROLS LOCKED_**

**_DESTINATION: HELIOS ONE_**

She screamed in frustration and pounded her slender fists upon the screen. She spun away in a snarl.

"Okay, universe!" Weiss shouted. "Here's my birthday wish! Just once for today- _just for once-_ LET SOMETHING GO RIGHT, DAMMIT!"

A soft ding alerted her back to the monitors. What she saw turned her anger to confusion.

_**SYSTEM ALERT**_

_**4N631 AUTHORIZATION ACCEPTED**_

_**CHANGING COURSE TO... PANDORA [Purple Level Threat Encounter Equipment recommended]**_

_**Message!**_

_**TO: Weiss Schnee**_

_**FROM: Angel**_

_**You're lucky my feelers in Jack's network detected your situation.**_

_**I can help you, but I need your help in return. I'm putting together a team to find Pandora's Vault. Maybe whatever is inside can help you get back on top, maybe not. Either way, Pandora's as good a place as any for you to disappear with Handsome Jack out there.**_

_**But if you want the CHANCE to change your life for the better... come meet me at Grandma's House: The Bed and Breakfast.**_

_**I'll be diverting your ship's path to a new friend of mine. She can take you there.**_

_**We can hash out terms when you arrive.**_

_**-Your (hopefully) new friend, Angel.**_

_**[END MESSAGE]**_

"... Fine." Weiss mumbled as she slumped down into the pilot's chair and watched as the stars flew past. "I'm not even going to question this. I give up."

She wasn't sure that going to Pandora was _anyone's_ idea of a good decision, but maybe once she was there she could finally hit rock bottom. _Then_ she could climb her way back to a better life.

Right?

* * *

After landing the ship in one of the many deserts of Pandora, Weiss walked away from the vessel and made her way towards a billboard laying beside a cracked road. The heat was already beyond what she could reasonably tolerate, but she would endure because she was a Schnee, dammit. And Schnee's _did not give in_ to hellish temperatures over seventy degrees! (No matter how _badly_ they wanted to.)

She walked past the dilapidated billboard and looking for this 'friend' she was supposed to rendezvous with. Unfortunately, she hadn't been paying attention beyond the rush of the desert wind, _and_ she hadn't been looking in the right direction.

Otherwise, she would have heard the engine of an oncoming car.

Otherwise, she would have noticed an obnoxiously red Runner breaking hard before her.

Otherwise, Ruby Rose would not have _'somewhat' run over her future best friend._

Weiss crashed to the ground as the Runner stopped. She could only distantly recognize the distinctive blue tattoo's of the driver as she jumped out of the car.

"Oh, my gosh! Are you alright?!" The Siren yelped in panic as yanked off her cloak, bundled it into a make-shift cushion, and gently placed it underneath Weiss's head. "I'm so, so sorry! I didn't see you! You just came right out from behind that sign as I was coming in and- _sorry!"_

Weiss opened and closed her mouth a few times before her dazed mind settled on an answer. "Today's my birthday..."

The young woman kneeling before her was silent for a moment, then quickly jogged back into the runner and pulled something out of a duffel bag. Making her way hastily back to Weiss's prone form, she offered the heiress a clear plastic container containing a slice of strawberry cake with vanilla frosting. "Happy birthday! It's a couple days old and it got bounced around in its box, but it's still good! I promise! My name's Ruby, by the way..."

It was everything Weiss could do not to break down and cry right then and there.

* * *

_A/N: Not as action heavy as the last one, I know, but I kind of wanted to focus more on Weiss' backstory for this one... And I wanted to write Jack lines._

* * *

_NAME: WEISS SCHNEE_

_CLASS: High_

_WEAPON: Myrtenaster_

_AGE: 19_

_HEIGHT: Slightly more than laughable_

_WEIGHT: Highly pushable_

_SEMBLANCE: Summoning_

_EQUIPMENT: Cutting edge support drone with flight, shielding, and offensive capabilities_

_WANTED: DEAD_

_CRIME: Defying a duly appointed Hyperion Death Squad_

_BOUNTY: $50 and a high five from a Handsome Jack doppelganger_

* * *

_NEXT TRAILER/CHAPTER: Savage Land Blake?_


	3. Chapter 3

_**BLACK**_

* * *

In the dark jungle of a deadly island, a fat scythid the size of a pony died as a razor sharp black blade plunged through it's head and down to it's tail. With a scream and a shudder, the beast died. Holding the bloody machete, was a black-haired cat-faunus. And, in the _other_ hand was a pistol with a folded blade atop it, and a long black ribbon wrapped around her arm. As the morning sunlight shone upon her, it revealed she was wearing fashionable black combat boots, several pouches strapped to her arms and legs, and...

... A very small black bikini with white trim.

I can explain.

Flicking the blood off the machete, the girl sighed as holstered her weapons

_**BLAKE BELLADONNA as**_

_**THE FORSAKEN NINJA**_

"Belladonna Log," She said into an ECHO unit withdrawn from one of her pouches. "I have, at long last, slaughtered the last of the scythids that destroyed my clothes. Well, all but two of my outfits. There was the nice expensive swimsuit Ilia got me, and the... _'outfit' _Adam gave me for my eighteenth birthday. Seeing how the bikini covers slightly more, I chose Ilia's while keeping the boots from Adam's. Side note: the other outfit was burned. Mysteriously." She sighed as she began to walk away from the dead slug monster. "This vengeance feels somewhat hollow, and not... as warm and fulfilling as I had hoped it would be. I will have to reflect on this so it doesn't repeat when I eventually mount Adam's head on spike."

Brushing past the foliage, she came to a gated fence that she leapt over with ease, and continued her monologue.

"As it is now approaching noon, I shall now exposit as to how I came to this abandoned island DAHL facility, as is my custom." Walking on a paved sidewalk, she made her way to a large series of buildings with corporate logos plastered all over the walls. "It all began when my ex-boyfriend, Adam Taurus, decided that everyone should try on these special Grimm-like masks that he got from... somewhere. (Side note: Find Adam's supplier and kill them all and burn their facility to the ground.) According to him, these masks would enhance our aura, augment our senses, boost our semblances, and make us completely undetectable by Grimm. Oh, and they _made everyone go crazy._

"And I don't mean, 'oh, she's so ca-razy' crazy, I mean some of the White Fang full-on turned into cannibals. Well, according to Adam it's not technically cannibalism when faunus are a different species from humanity. And I argued, 'THAT'S FUCKING SEMANTICS, ADAM! SCORPINA IS CHEWING ON A HUMAN HAND! WHAT ARE YOU?! A FUCKING PSYCHOPATH?!'

"And that was how we broke up. He had the rest of the White Fang troops dogpile me after that. Told me he'd leave me somewhere where I could 'think about what I said.' That somewhere turned out to be Pandora. A world that makes the mythological land of Australia look positively habitable. Not only that, but an _abandoned island on Pandora with no escape._ Because that's what a sane person does when his girlfriend breaks up with him.

"Now, the only company I have is the _ridiculously lethal_ Pandoran wildlife, and the dead bodies of the DAHL workers who were stationed here. Hey, Phil." Blake waved to a human skeleton adorned in a weathered lab technician's uniform lying to the side of the path.

"Never answers back. No wonder Becky's cheating on him." Blake snorted.

"Positive things to focus on while I try to sleep in the most secure supply closet in the building: One, there are no Grimm here. Most likely due to the fact that I'm the only one here, and they tend to focus on highly populated area's. Kind of makes me getting my Huntress license kind of pointless, but less problems, less stress.

"Two, this place still has power, running water, and fully stocked food stores. I could survive here for a decade without worrying about it.

"Three... _(Side note: find a 'three.')_

"Things I should not focus on in the middle of the night that will cause me to cry myself to sleep: One, the wildlife on this island is everything I'd heard about Pandora. There are no herbivores on this planet. Even some of the damn plants are carnivorous. Keeping them at bay is a constant challenge. Some are even more nightmarish and fearsome than even _Grimm._ Well... standard ones anyway.

"Two, every single piece of equipment in this horrible, miserable island that still functions... _needs DAHL clearance to use!_ I'm not technologically gifted! The only things I hack are with my machete! I have no way to reach out to my loved ones or friends that I need a lift out of this place!

"Three! All the automated defenses- turrets, robots, electric fences- have all been disabled by the wildlife who have made it their mission to destroy anything in this place! Probably explains all the DEAD PEOPLE I keep finding!

"Four. Dwindling sanity. Reflecting on _that-_ never.

"Five, if I ever get back to civilization, I'm gonna have to admit to my parents that they were _right_ about Adam. Ugh.

"Six, there's not even any edible goddamn fish, I'm so angry.

"Seven... I'm worried about my only friend left in the White Fang. I'm not sure if Ilia got wind of the what was going on with the masks, or if she had one _put on her._ All I can hope is she got out and is safe and sound somewhere. Oh, and that reminds me...

"Eight. The masks. They're entirely to much like the masks Grimm put on Bandits for it to be coincidence. There are key differences, though. Bandits can't use aura, and they're not much for taking orders. The White Fang _can._ Gods, I hope Adam doesn't have an unlimited supply of those things. If it gets out that the Fang is turning into crazed super killers, the corporations just might cooperate enough that they can come down on ALL faunus."

Blake finally came to the central building, and jumped through an already broken window. Passing by a series of computer banks with spinning DAHL logo's on their monitors, she began to wrap up her log.

"And now, I shall engage in my daily ritual of staring at the empty wall for an hour as my mind slowly unravels as I come to terms that no one will ever find me in this godforsaken place."

_"Um, hello? Is anyone using this facility? Are you okay?"_ Came a woman's voice from a monitor, as she found Blake in this godforsaken place.

Blake stopped and went still for all of five seconds. Then her boots _screeched_ as she turned sharply and ran back to the computer banks. She saw two blue eyes of a pale woman staring back at her.

"HI! HELLO!" Blake yelled in panic. "I'VE BEEN TRAPPED HERE FOR TWO YEARS, PLEASE HELP ME!"

When Angel responded, there was hesitation in her voice. _"You... survived two years on Screaming Death island?"_

Blake's ears flattened. "Screaming what now?"

_"It's what the local's renamed the place after all the DAHL personnel were eaten by the wildlife."_

"... Fitting." Blake took a calming breath. "I'm Blake, I'm a... Huntress." She said honestly. "I crashed here." She fibbed.

_"I'm Angel,"_ The eyes said. _"And I would love to help."_

It took everything Blake had not to scream, laugh, and cry for joy. _"Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou-"_

_"Er, before that, can I ask if you've seen memory drives labeled Project Wonderstorm?"_ Angel asked hopefully.

Blake fished out a drive out of one of her pouches. It was significantly scratched and dented. "I found it in my first few months here. Looked important so I held on to it."

Angel's eyebrow quirked. _"Oof, that looks like it's seen better days. Better get that in person if I want to get any information off it."_ There was a pause._ "... Huh. This actually works out perfectly. You said you were a huntress? How do you feel about a little Vault hunting?"_

Blake's ears flickered. "Um, not to be rude, and please don't take this the wrong way, but I would very much like to leave Pandora. Completely. Forever. For all time."

_"Completely understandable,"_ Angel soothed. _"But you should know, there is no available FTL ships on Pandora. When DAHL pulled out, they took all those ships with them. The only FTL ships that come by here either drop off travelers or shipments to people who can afford off-world delivery. And even then, they never leave orbit- only using shuttles and drones to interact with the surface."_

A look of horror dawned on Blake's face. "So there's no way out?!"

_"Sometimes people who can afford it can call an interstellar travel agency to pick them up and leave the system. But that takes money. A LOT of money. Cash that you probably don't have right now."_

Blake slumped to to the ground in defeat.

_"Look, I'll make you a deal. You help me get to the Vault, and I will do everything in my power to get us and few others off this rock. Promise."_

"Okay. Looks like I get to put the old Huntress training to even _further_ use." Blake inhaled deeply. "Deal. Now how do I get out of here?"

Angel's eyes looked hesitant. _"... Ever try an orbital bounce?"_

Blake's eye twitched. "Isn't that where a tractor beam in space picks up a pod, drags it into orbit, and launches it somewhere else on the planet?"

_"Yep."_

"... Wouldn't any satellites in orbit capable of that be long since abandoned by everyone, and in disrepair?

_"Yep."_

"Ever done this before?"

_"Nope."_

Blake dragged her hands across her face. "Screw it, I'm out of options. Let's do this."

_"First, I'm gonna need you to unlock the bay doors for the cargo pod."_

"Can't." Blake sighed. "Almost every system I could hope to use in this place requires restricted access."

_"Ah,"_ Angel replied. _"Got your IHA ID on you?"_

Blake rummage through her rucksack and retrieved a plastic card with her face and information printed on it. She held it in front of the monitor's camera.

_"Wait one moment. Executing Phase Shift."_

The screen's feed suddenly became incredibly distorted and briefly had alien-looking script run across. The camera emitted a bright blue light over the ID card, which made it _tingle_ in Blake's hand. After a moment it was over, and the screen returned to normal.

_"There you go!"_ Angel said happily. _"You now have complete access to this facility, Administrator Blake... Belladonna?"_

Blake sighed wearily. "Yes. Of _those_ Belladonna's. Long story, not enough incentive to tell it." Remembering her _manners,_ she quickly followed with, "Thank you for this."

_"Okay, once you get those bay doors open, the satellite we're going to be using for this should be in range in about... ooh! Nine minutes! Lucky!"_

"Awesome." Blake smiled, feeling as if she was filled with hope at long last. Then the crushing weight of reality slapped it out of her as a thought crossed her mind. "Wait. The bay doors. The big doors in the ground in the courtyard. The big doors that will most likely cause a ton of noise and vibration. Vibration and noise that will startle and anger t he wildlife."

_"... Oh."_

_"Frick."_ Blake cursed. "I'll just... I'll just have to deal with them as it comes. Line up the satellite, I'll be on the pod when it takes off."

_"Okay, calculating trajectories."_ And, as an afterthought, she added, _"Be seeing you soon, Blake."_

"You will. That's a _promise."_ She swore more to herself than to Angel as here eyes disappeared from the monitor.

She inhaled deeply, then ran to the window, jumped out of it, and hurried to the huge bay doors embedded into the ground. She came to a small terminal built into a signpost.

"Time to see if I hallucinated that conversation or not..." Blake mumbled.

She swiped her license over the machine and was _absolutely delighted_ when the screen unlocked, showing a new display. She immediately hit the large OPEN button in huge green letters.

There was a tense moment, and then the doors began to retract. They _screeched_ and rumbled as their un-oiled joints and gears slid them apart. The _ground_ shook as the rectangular cargo pod began to ascend on an elevator. Blake cursed loudly as she realized that it was even louder than she had feared it was going to be. She quickly hopped onto the rising floor, and hit the door control to open the pod- effectively making sure it was ready once it was time.

She turned around, already knowing what she was about to see. An entire skag pack- horrible scaled creatures with back spines and vertically aligned mouths- jumping over the walls. Crab worms- basically giant crabs with snake-like lower bodies- burst from the ground. Horrible slug-like scythids pushing through gaps in the facilities outer fence. And finally, a flock of rakk's- bat-like monsters with suckers for mouths- circled overhead.

Her eyes narrowed as she watched the converging wildlife closing in on her position. She snatched the ECHO unit out of her bag and held it to her face.

"Belladonna Final Log. I will either leave this gods-forsaken island,_ or I shall kill everything on it._ There will be_ no in-between._ The cargo pod is ready. The satellite's tractor beam is locking onto it's position. And I am so _beyond done_ with this place. Well... all right, it wan't _all_ bad. This island has taught me that instead of running away from them, it is better to face your problems head on. And murder them with your pistol-whip-machete. Because half measures are for dead people." Unsheathing her weapon, she brought the tip of her sword against the ECHO unit's screen. "Due to how little I wish to address how my sanity has been eroded by this island, I have decided to destroy you, ECHO log. None can know of my secret fish thoughts. Thank you and farewell."

She plunged the blade through the unit, and directly into the memory core. With a twist, it was ruined beyond all repair.

She looked toward the monsters. It appeared they were circling her or keeping their distance, either because they felt she was no easy prey, or because they were all feeling cautious with competing predators about. Blake took the opportunity to fetch a black device out of her bag, and attached it to her left arm. "Hope this still works..." She mumbled.

She steeled her nerves, and focused on how much she _hated_ this island and _everything_ on it.

Blake inhaled deeply, and quietly gave her guests a message she knew they'd never understand.

"A scorched earth response would be my pick on how to deal with all of you, but until my ride's ready to go, I'll have to do my best to come up with something... _almost as satisfying."_ With a click on the device, Blake vanished from sight.

As of the skags looked about in confusion, and then Blake appeared out of thin air and took it's head with a swipe of her blades. It's pack-mates screamed in outrage and began to lob globules of acidic barf-shit (don't ask) at her. Blake deftly dodged and flipped away, allowing a good chunk of the projectiles to splash among the beasts, burning their hides and causing them to shriek in agony. Blake took advantage of this chaos, dived back in and stabbed, and stabbed, and stabbed, _and stabbed, and stabbed, and stabbed, and stabbed, and stabbed, AND STABBED, AND STABBED, AND STABBED-_ and, oh hey. All the skags were dead now.

She barely had a moment to gather herself before a crab worm launched itself from the ground at her. For a moment, it looked like it had collided with her, only to reveal it had moved through some kind of _image_ of her. Before it could reorient itself, the real Blake appeared at it's side, jammed her gun into one of it's many eyes, and unloaded a round into it's brain.

Taking an offensive stance, she leapt in between the remaining crab worms and fired shots into their plates. Not to do much damage, but to get their attention. She led the furious beasts on a merry chase... directly into the scythids that had been slowly making their way into the fray. She took her weapons- Gambol Shroud- and _cut_ and _swiped_ into scythid flesh as she ran past. As their blood spilled onto the ground, she hoped it would have the desired effect. She glanced back and smiled. The crab worms had decided to focus on the far easier prey that the scythids represented rather than pursue her.

Her feeling of victory was short lived as a_ goddamn-shit-born-motherfucking-bastard-from-hell_ rakk smacked into her face, knocking her to the ground.

Instinctively, she swiped at the air above her with her machete. She was quickly rewarded as it's blade sank into the flesh of two separate rakk's, killing them both. Back flipping back onto her feet, she readied herself to ground the flying assholes.

Another trio of rakk's dived toward her. This time, she sidestepped the leader and grabbed onto it's neck, and let her self be carried off the ground. Once it had pulled her high up into the air, and up to the rest of it's flock, Blake grinned in savage satisfaction. With one smooth motion, she disemboweled the creature with her gun-blade.

Hopping away from it's falling body, Blake pushed away from it and into the next rakk that needed killing. Hacking that one apart, she launched herself to _another_ and repeated the process. She did this again, and again, and again.

This went on for some time.

Finally, she came to the rakk that had initially knocked her into the ground. She took dark glee as she landed onto it's back, reached over, and _plunged_ Gambol Shroud's katana into it's belly. Kicking off, she launched into mourning breeze.

She looked about as she realized she had killed had, in fact, been the last of the rakks. While _very high_ in the air. Blake now came to the conclusion that it was time to formulate a landing strategy.

Descending quickly, she whipped out her blade-gun-ribbon... thing (it's a weird weapon to describe, okay?) and snagged it onto a flag pole bearing a weathered DAHl flag. Swinging herself around it enough to defuse her momentum, she untangled Gambol Shroud in mid-air and landed back in the courtyard.

Because huntresses can do that. Shut up.

She looked about and saw the remaining crab worms and scythids were still at war with each other. Deciding that she had wasted enough time, she left them to their Darwin-flavored violence.

Blake ran hard as she could back to the pod, and closed the doors behind her. For a long thirty seconds, there was nothing, but then... it began to _rise._

The young huntress cackled with the delight of a madwoman. Spinning and dancing as she was finally _free._

Although, Blake did enough presence of mind left to flip the double bird at the pods view-port as the vehicle was pulled away from the island.

"Now! For my next trick! Getting out of this _system!"_ She exclaimed as the laughter died down. "Which will probably only take... a gigantic... sum of money... that I'll probably have to build up over the course of years..." Her face lit up again. "Maybe I can just call Mom and Dad! They...!" Her face fell. "They're... probably being monitored by _Adam._ If he hasn't... dealt with them, that is..."

She felt dread spread throughout her body.

"Oh, cool. I can still depress myself."

* * *

_NAME: Blake Belladonna_

_CLASS: Cat Ninja_

_WEAPON: Gambol Shroud_

_AGE: 19_

_HEIGHT: Tall drink of water_

_WEIGHT: Super model_

_SEMBLANCE: Semi-solid clones_

_EQUIPMENT: Invisibility cloak_

_WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE_

_CRIME: Terrorism group affiliation {See White Fang}_

_BOUNTY: $50,000,000_


	4. Chapter 4

_**YELLOW**_

* * *

In the morning mist of Paradise-9, a beautiful young woman with long blonde hair slumbered on top of a statue of a oversized bronze horse. She wore a loud, open, blue Hawaiian t-sirt with yellow lilies, a black tube top, and neon yellow shorts. Completing the look, she was tattooed with an elaborate golden dragon that _shimmered _in the faint morning light that began with being 'wrapped' up her left leg, twice around her waist, and leading up her back and around her left arm with it's head lying at her wrist. She snored gently until the scroll in her shirt pocket began to vibrate incessantly. Groaning, she reached into her shirt, and pulled the device out- which unbalanced her enough to dislodge her from the statue and onto the damp grass, and two leather-clad boots.

"Oh, hey. So that's where my shoes went." She mumbled, taking a moment to stand up and _stretch _before blearily opening her bright purple eyes to check her scroll.

_**YANG XIAO LONG as...**_

_**THE GOLDEN DRAGON**_

Quirking a brow at the name and face appearing on her call screen, Yang smiled and answered. "Hey-hey, Rubles. Just woke me up from a..." She searched her mind for the least embarrassing answer. "Power nap. How's things? Find any new jobs yet to use that fancy licence on?"

_"Hey, Yang! Sorry to interupt your vacation! And, well- Yes and no! Kind of need you help!"_

Yang's smile faded. "Okay, where are you? Is it bounty hunters again? Because me and Dad spent a lot of time and ammo coming to an _understanding _over you with the Guildmaster."

_"No, no! That's probably another problem for another day!"_

_"Bounty hunters? Are you a fugitive or something?" _Said a voice Yang could hardly make out in the background.

_"Weiss. I'm a _Siren." Ruby answered, clearly talking to someone else. _"Sorry, Yang! That's my new partner-and hopefully-future-bestie Weiss. We met when I accidentally- gently- ran her over with a car when she crossed the road without looking."_

_"GENTLY?!" _Weiss yelled.

_"Weiss, please. I'm on the scroll, and I already apologized and promised I'd make it up to you." _Yang could make out indignant huffing_. "So, anyway, I need you help- well, actually, this person I'm supposed to be teaming up with is stuck in orbit, and she needs help. I think she was doing an orbital bounce-y thing, but it turned out the re-enty thrusters are out of commission. Stale fuel or something. Could you swing by in _Bumblebee _and pick her up? Please? I'll split my-"_

"Easy, easy. Where are you, anyway? Can't you just contact local orbital emergency services and get her help?" Yang asked as she pulled on her socks and boots.

_"Yeah... about that..." _Ruby laughed awkwardly. _"I'm- well, I'm on... Pandora."_

Yang went very still. "Ruby?"

_"Yes, dearest big wonderful sister whom has proclaimed her love of me over any bad decision I might make in my entire lifetime?"_

"You, me, and Dad had a very long talk about why you should never go to Pandora." Yang very slowly and clearly.

_"I remember it was more _yelling _than talki-"_

"Ruby. Pandora is where Sirens go to _die!" _Yang yelled.

"_Yeah, it went a lot like that..." _Ruby added weakly.

"FOR THE BROTHER'S SAKE, RUBY!"

_"I had to figure out what all these Vault dreams were about! And I figured I could get some practice doing missions and bounties here! And even if I found nothing, I could at least look back on all this knowing I at least tried!" _Her younger sister defended herself, not that it made much of a difference to Yang.

"I'm coming to get you right now. Your new friends can tag along if they want-"

_"If I may..." _Said a new voice very clearly into the line. _"I believe I can safely mitigate the dangers a Siren might face went looking for the Vault."_

Yang yanked away the scroll from her ear and saw that someone had indeed hooked into their private line. "How the f- this is an IHA scoll comm line! Who are you and how did y-"

_"I'm Angel, and this is kind of what I do. I hope you don't mind too much, but I kind of got our new friend stuck in orbit, and I really need someone- anyone- to help her. I swear I'll make it worth your while."_

Yang narrowed her eyes. "Uh huh... and because I just _know _Ruby probably didn't even ask, but what are you going to be paying for this doomed treasure hunt?"

_"Oh- well, I kind of had some ideas that-" _Angel replied awkwardly before being interupted.

_"Oh, relax Angel. I can tell she's going to come. She's just milking you for cash."_ Ruby sighed.

_"I might not have any money on me right now, but I can make that arrest warrant and bounty you have on Tartarus Prime go away."_

_"Yang!" _Ruby exclaimed in admonishing tone.

Yang bristled. "That was a _complete _misunderstanding."

_"You stole the planetary governor's horse, threw Molotov cocktails at his giant wooden statue, spray painted his golden turbo-mansion, punched your way through a police barricade, and broke fifteen traffic laws as you made your getaway into space. What... was misunderstood?"_

_"Seriously, Yang?!" _Ruby cried in familial shame.

"If he didn't want any of that to happen, then he should have _understood _that paying me what he owed me for clearing out those Ursa's is what he _should _have done!" Yang protested. "Two of them were _alpha's. _He's _lucky _I didn't take it to the IHA and get him and his lousy lava-world _blacklisted. _That bit of mercy should have made up for anything I did."

_"Well, you can't cure stupid. But _I _would very much appreciate your assistance in this. And I promise an even split on any loot we find."_

She hummed as she mused over the offer. "Well... if you can hack the IHA comm network, I _guess _you can do what you say... fine, I was gonna help anyway. I'll get the show on the road." Yang rolled her eyes. "See you soon, Rubes."

_"Thankyouthankyou! See you then!"_

_"Yes, thank yo-"_

Yang hung up.

* * *

Yang's large-yet-sleek, black and yellow fighter/RV- the _Bumblebee II- _exited Paradise Nine's solar system without incident. It wasn't until she left the dizzying light of FTL that she felt the hairs on the back of her neck raise. Looking at the display in her cockpit, she couldn't help but remember all the horror stories her father used to tell her and Ruby about Pandora. He would tell them about how Pandora was initially a DAHL Eridium mining colony that failed _hard. _He told them how even though the company was ready to deal with Grimm, _nothing _could have prepared them for the local wildlife. Entire settlements would go dark in the night from fearless packs of skags, or they were invaded from from underground by hungry spider-ants, and they even suffered horrific sieges from rakk hives.

And the terror from these incidents drew the Grimm like a lion to a wounded antelope. The settlers that had the misfortune to survive the attacks would become the beginnings of Pandora's excessively high Bandit population.

DAHL attempted to recoup there losses, and made the ultimate concession... they sold parts of Pandora to Atlas, Hyperion, the up and coming SDC, and Jakobs. An unprecedented move for such a world rich in valuable Eridium. But... like all other attempts to tame Pandora, it was only more meat for the grinder.

Eventually, all five companies pulled out. The higher paid managers were moved off world without incident, the _workers _however, were given a choice; Forfeit any claims to their pay, or be left on Pandora with what little money they were owed.

Far too many chose the latter... and even more were enticed to search for the mythical alien Vault allegedly containing lost treasure.

Yang shook her head and pushed the sub-light engines to the max and streamed past the system's many other planets and towards her destination. She would rescue this orbital damsel in distress, find Ruby, _and drag her kicking and screaming from this hellhole-deathtrap-world if she had to._

She hooked a small headset over her ear, adjusted the mic, and linked her scroll to it. A quick call connected her to her sister. "Okay sis, I'm approaching Pandora. Shoot me the coordinates for this- what's her name?"

_"Sending coordinates, and Angel said her name was Blake."_

"Got it." Yang confirmed, and adjusted her course accordingly. Eventually, she came into Pandora's orbit and towards the pod. She angled _Bumblebee II _towards the pod's viewport get a look at whoever it was she was saving... and then she saw her.

Yang beheld the vision that was Blake Belladonna in a bikini, jumping up and down and waving for her to rescue her.

Yang took a moment to mentally store this sight in her memory for future lonely nights, and then she signaled her sister.

"Ruby."

_"Yeah, sis?"_

"You got me a cat faunus in a bikini awaiting my heroic rescue. It's not even my birthday. _How do I top this for yours?"_

"A biki- what? Yang, we both agreed you'd never get into Uncle Qrow's 'special occasion' mushroom bag ever again."

_"Er, about that..." _Angel interjected.

_"... What?"_

_"She is, in fact, bikini clad."_

_"Why?" _Ruby asked, dumbfounded.

_"I don't know! I didn't want to ask! Maybe she comes from a very open minded and suitably temperate world!" _Angel whined.

"Well, now she's fogging up the glass of her viewport, and writing 'help,' so I probably should hurry up and save her." Yang said, purposefully cutting the conversation short.

Giving a thumbs up to the trapped Huntress, she angled her ship to the top of the cargo pod, secured it to _Bumblebee II's _belly with the on-board tractor beam, and prepared for a planetary descent.

And that was when things went to wrong.

The ship rocked violently as Yang swore. Checking the readouts, the FTL drive had suffered catastrophic failure. She stood up and leaned so she could see the top of her craft, and lo and behold, there was a _freaking harpoon _stuck into the hull. She followed the chain connecting it to her ship up, up, and up and saw a hideous craft seemingly made from spare parts. Riding it's hull, was six normal sized people in patchwork spacesuits wielding guns and pick-axes. And behind _them, _was one very rotund man in an armored version of the others' suits, casually leaning on a heavy chain-axe. Yang huffed in irritation.

"Dearest, Rubles." She commed her sister as she grabbed her Oz kit. "Why am I besieged by assholes in EVA suits?"

_"What?"_

_"Ugh..." _Angel groaned. _"Sounds like Scav's. Old miners from Pandora's moon, Elpis. Allegedly they all went crazy and went full-raiders after over-exposure from the... Moon Rocks."_

"Moon Rocks." Yang repeated.

_"DAHL is bad at naming things. You shouldn't have to much trouble dealing with these guys. Most of them were just everyday laborers who never even unlocked their semblances."_

"I'll have to hold you to that." Yang said as she slapped the Oz kit on to her shoulder. Popping open a small compartment beside her chair, she pulled out a pair of heavy golden bracelets and slid them on. Reaching in once more, she also retrieved a heavy belt with a complicated dial attachment on it's side. After she put it on, she lightly punched a button below the cockpit's viewscreen.

The cockpit began to depressurize, and the viewscreen opened. Reacting instantly, Yang's Oz kit sprang to life, giving her the air and protection she would need for vacuum. Yang grinned as she fixed her eyes on the Scav's that had been stupid enough to try and rob her. Maybe having her vacation interupted wasn't so bad after all.

With a hard leap, she jumped to the chain that attached their ships, and used it to _launch _herself at her opponents.

The Scav's, only caught a _little _flatfooted, fired wildly at her with their cobbled together assault rifles. The rounds that did hit her only served to strike her Aura... and fed her semblance.

With a flick of her hands, she let go of the chain, and transformed her bracelets- revealing twin barrels in each. She tensed her hand, and the bracelets known as Ember Celica fired, altering and accelerating her trajectory. She flew above them- _whatever that means in space- _and then used the combined power of both her Oz kit and her weapons to _rocket _into the Scav ship. All seven of it's crew held on for dear life as the shockwave reverberated throught the vessel.

Taking advantage of the confusion, Yang grabbed the nearest one to her.

"Sorry! Shouldn't have tried to hijack me!" She halfheartedly apologized.

Then she switched her right gauntlet to a _timed _Torgue round, fired it into the Scav's belly, and _threw _him into his recovering crewmates.

The poor man popped like a meat balloon, splattering and showering the other Scav's with his insides. Some reacted with horror, some tried to wipe the viscera off their helmets, and Yang... _advanced._

One shotgun punch removed a man's head. A second cut another in half at the waist. One poor fool charged in with his pick-axe. Yang grabbed it mid swing, and _pushed _it's trajectory into another Scav's face, skewering his brain as he had tried to flank the young Huntress. The pick-axe wielder was shortly dealt with as Yang yanked out his weapon and inserted it into his forehead _handle first._

A fifth Scav screamed as he fired two assault rifles at the blonde _demon _that had slaughtered two thirds of his raiding party. Yang tanked the damage, dove into a slide, swept his legs out from under him with a kick, and proceeded to cave in his skull with her other leg.

"HAVE SOME O' THIS, YA MAD DRONGO!" Shouted the armored Scav with the axe. He then threw what Yang recognised as a flashbang.

Instinctively closing her eyes, she knew she didn't have to worry about the sound in space, all that mattered was bracing her Aura for the kinectic force of the device. The blast knocked her back a few steps, and she grinned at the now charging Scav with anticipation. It would be _so cool_ if she timed this right.

The axe came down.

Yang's eyes blazed _red._

And then... her hair glowed gold, and there was a blur of motion as she stepped forward. The big Scav stared dumbly down at his chest... which had the young Huntress' arm embedded in it up to her _elbow. _The battleaxe drifted away from his fingers into the darkness of space as he died.

Yang pulled her arm out of his chest and shook the blood off. She then took the opportunity to use the rest of her semblance's power to pummel the Scav's outer engines into scrap. If there was anyone still inside, _they _could now enjoy being helpless in space.

After a brief shotgun burst, she made her way back to the top of her ship. "Okay, those guys are dealt with, now to lose my unasked-for weight."

_"In respect of our mutual sisterly love, I'm going to choose not to make a joke about that. Even though it would be super easy." _Ruby commed in solemnly.

"'Preciate it," Yang droned as she set her feet astride the rusty old harpoon, grabbed it by the haft, and yanked.

With the Scav harpoon finally ripped off _Bumblebee II, _Yang was dismayed to see that it had taken along with it a skewered, and very FUBAR'd FTL drive.

Yang cursed long and hard. After a moment, she sighed and composed herself.

"FTL drive is _gone _ladies. We're stuck in this system. I'm gonna land shortly and get my bearings." Yang sighed into the comm. Then inspiration struck her, causing a slow unrepentant grin to spread across her face. "I also gotta... _let the cat out of the bag!"_

_"Ugh, whyyyyyyyyy?" _Ruby moaned as she cut the line.

Yang sighed lightly. Some people couldn't appreciate a good pun. Even though she and her father had tried on Ruby almost every single day of her childhood.

"Might as well make the best of all this." She mumbled to herself. "Least I get to meet the cutie in the pod."

* * *

Making her way out of orbit, Yang dragged the cargo pod down to a abandoned looking stretch of desert. As gently as she could, she flew low to the ground and dropped the pod. She proceeded to then land the fighter a few yards away. Leaving the cockpit, moving past the living space, and out through the cargo area past where she'd strapped her hovercycle, she exited her craft.

Loud repeated banging sounds revealed that Blake was having difficulty opening the rusty pod doors. Yang approached the viewport and knocked to get her attention. Blake's head turned, and her would-be savior mouthed the words, 'stand back.' She nodded and moved toward the back of the pod. With a shotgun assisted punch, Yang punched the viewport into millions of tiny shards.

"Never fear, your ride is here!' Yang proclaimed. "Nice to meet you, I'm Yang Xiao Long, and I'm-"

She was unable to finish her sentence before Blake walked up to her and started poking her face. Getting a hold of her self, she retracted her hand and had decency to blush. "Sorry! Sorry! I was trapped on an island for two years and I had to check to see whether or not you were a hallucination."

Yang grinned. "Well, I'm about as real as it gets."

"I'm Blake," She said and shot her hand forward between them, Yang took it in her own, twisted it upwards and brought her knuckles to her lips and gave them a very ladylike kiss.

"Pleasure's all mine."

Blake averted her eyes and laughed nervously. "We, uh, should get going! Angel and the others are waiting for us at a place called 'Grandma's House: The Bed and Breakfast.' I can give you the coordinates."

"Sure thing," Yang smiled and gestured toward _Bumblebee II. _"Your chariot awaits!"

Blake smiled in awkward gratitiude and followed Yang into her ship. After punching in the provided coordinates, they were off to Grandma's House.

"So..." Blake mumbled as she leaned against the cockpit's door frame. "I know I'm pretty indebted to you for that save, and I hate to ask for anything more..."

Yang rolled her eyes with a grin. "Y'know, what? I'm feeling generous. Shoot."

Blake's ears flattened in embarrassment. "... Could I bother you for a spare pair of pants? Now that I'm among _an actual breathing person _for the first time in years, I feel more exposed than the corpses on the island as the sun bleached their bones."

Yang's smile perfectly covered her internal dismay. "Sure. I got a pair of black skinny jeans that should fit you." Yang took one last look up and down her new traveling companion. "Might be a bit tight in the hips though."

"Thanks. Really."

Yang shrugged and set the controls to autopilot. The FTL drive may be gone, but the sub-light engines were more than ready for a cross continent journey. She got out of her chair and ushered Blake into the living quarters as _Bumblebee_ flew on.

She took one last look out the cockpit's window, and let out a small laugh.

"Guess I'm going Vault hunting, after all."

* * *

_NAME: Yang Xiao Long_

_CLASS: Brawler_

_WEAPON: Ember Celica_

_AGE: 19_

_HEIGHT: Non-laughable_

_WEIGHT: {INFORMATION MISSING- FILES DELETED}_

_SEMBLANCE: Kinetic absorption and redistribution._

_EQUIPMENT: Elemental damage shroud_

_WANTED: ALIVE_

_CRIME: Vandalism, arson, assault, destruction of property, horse theft._

_BOUNTY: $30,000_

* * *

_Next chapter: Meet Angel, the Siren of being in over her head._


End file.
